Basketball

2008.10.5

Sometime around September, Oh receives a call from a unknown number. It was an executive director of LG Sakers, Korean professional basketball team. "I know that this offer is long over due but we would like to hire you as a chief translator for our basketball team. We are impressed with your resume and all the experience of yours in relation to basketball. Wanna come help us out? We are going down to the Philippines soon to participate in the official Korean Basketball League tryout for foreign mercenary players."
Oh from time to time envisions himself become a basketball player. When he was a 4th grader, his parents bought him a b-ball and Oh did not know that was going to make basketball part of his life down the road.
In middle school, his skills were already famous in town and thus always he played b-ball with high school kids and local adults. When he turned 15, with his b-ball buddies he participated in NIKE 3:3 Basketball Championship in Seoul (Middleschool Division). As a result, his team "ARK" which Oh named after "Ark" in the Bible, took the second place in entire Seoul after beating more then 1,000 teams in the bracket, except for one they met in the final. Oh named his ARK just like Noah and his family survived ARK. He wanted him and his teammate to survive the tournament.
Once the PE coach asked Oh to participate in a try out at this high school renowned for
basketball. Oh hesitated, but decided not to because he was way too smart (at least back then he thought he was) to dedicate his whole life to a sport. Coincidentally, he got admitted to one of the best high schools in Korea later.


In high school, Oh was basketball, literally. During annual sport day, Oh enraptured lots of girls by showing off his behind back pass, and quisy-Magic Johnson no look pass and whatnot. So, his seniors and juniors, while not knowing Oh's real name, always called him "B-ball Boy" or "The guy who plays ball real good" He and his teammates won two annual intramural basketball championships. In his senior year, Oh established a basketball club. Still, when he runs into his alumni, people recall him as someone who was really good at basketball.
In the military, he played b-ball with African American soldiers. It was a culture shock to him. They were huge, tall, big and above all real. He knew that he won't be able to beat them in terms of physical conditions. But Oh had a brain. He survived at least amongst fellow Korean soldiers. He won 1 championship, 1 runner up and another 2nd Infantry Division Basketball Championship. Once when Oh was on a vacation, his boss personally called him to ask to come back to the camp to play some games, which Oh said to yes for his fellow Korean soldiers. Oh knew that if he said no, that boss would give him and his fellow Koreans a hard time for Oh's disobeying.
In the U.S. Oh studied real hard. And he needed to relieve stress from time to time, so went the gym. Oh was very lucky to study at the University of Iowa, one of BIG TEN schools in Midwest. He met a bunch of Chinese-Americans and Korean-Americans. They called Oh Korean Yao Ming. For the first time in his life, Oh bought a pair of Micheal Jordan shoes. He still has them and rarely puts them on.
Today again, Oh wonders what if he accepted P.E. teacher's offer and became a professional basketball player. Oh's uncle, once a basketball player, even asked Oh to take part in a try-out when Oh was 14 or 15, which Oh turned down. Then, Oh shakes off "What ifs" What is important is now, not what ifs.

Oh used to count how many games he's lost since Day 1. The last number he can recall now is 30 or 40 something.
Oh misses one of those days when he is on the floor, passing the ball around, shooting from downtown and puts up a beautiful reverse layup, the crowd goes crazy and claps for him. That ecstatic and indescribable moment is something unforgettable for the rest of his life.

Understanding vs Acceptance

2008.10. 4

On his way back to Suwon from Seoul this morning, Oh starts to think about the definitions of love. They are too many to count. Oh thinks that it is futile to try to draw a definition of love.

But he believes that love has something to do with acceptance rather than understanding.

Understanding requires a complete or partial empathy meaning you should be able to relate your own life to others'. So, when you say that "I understand.", it means that you know exactly what others are talking about or what they are going through because you have been there and done that. For example, if a friend of yours were to be dumped, you would say "I understand what you are going through." As long as you went through a breakup or at least were dumped, you are entitled to say "I understand."



Oh then thinks that people too easily say "If I were you... if I were in your shoes.. I would do this and that.." because they will never be able to understand what it is like to be under the very particular circusmtance." But Oh also thinks that saying that meaningless sentence is a least attempt and a meaningful gesture to console the person in agony.



Consecutively, Oh then questions. If understand fall shorts, then what would be qualified as an entity that is closest to the essence of love. Oh always thinks that acceptance is the answer.



In English, people use to say "I like you for you who are." Since he learned this usage, he enjoys using it when necessary. The quote above indicates that one accept, likes the other regardless of any kind of exteior or interior conditions that he or he is under.

While understanding is about partial condition of one person, acceptance talks about "as a whole"

For this reason, Oh thinks that acceptance is a better definition for love than understanding. Take family for example. Your family embraces you for who you are. Your parents, or siblings do not particular make attempts to understand you, but simply accept you and love you for who you are under the name of family.

Your dad might ground you for a week since you sunck out of the house and were on a date with this guy. You dad says, "Teenage boys are all beasts and out of control. You have no idea what they can do to you." He (your dad) might not understand what you are going through. You think you love this guy, and your libido is out of control and you even think about having a baby with him and whatnot.

If even you get knocked up, your boy friend ditches you, your dad still supports you. (There are always exceptions, sadly) And that is acceptance and that is love.


It really does not matter the person that likes you does not know anything about your job, or hobby or whatnot. He or she still is ready to accept you for you are. If you try to understand every bit of the person you like, it would be hardly possible to do so. This is so because you are not him or her.


But accepting other is very possible although it is too arduous. But it pays off eventually. If you try to understand others, there are moments when you just want to quit doing that because you can not relate yourself/yourlife to his or her. But once you accept others sincerely, then it gets easier.

Lastly, Oh finds what Bible says about Acceptance and spots excerpts from Samuel.

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7b)

A whole new experience

2008.10.3.

Oh wakes up to his cel phone alarm clock, then starts to hesitate whether he will go to the office today and take a short trip to Paju with his mentor. He does not have to, but then thinks that it will be a great opportunity to learn lots of things about his work and to be more professional. So, he gets up, jumps in a shower, pops and scrambles two eggs and gulps down a can of tuna, pieces of bread and milk. Munching food, Oh thinks that what is going to be ahead of himself today, not knowing a lot of things are going to transpire.


His mentor is already at work. Oh asks what the itinerary is today. After giving a very helpful lecture to his mentee, as usual, the mentor suggests they hit the road. Oh, of course, calls "Shotgun"

Traffic is not too bad. Sun's beating down on them. Oh's tapping his fingers according to "Nobody" by Wonder Girls.

After wasting 90 minutes, they arrive Paju, pull up the car at the parking lot for this particular restaurant whose food Oh and his mentor need to sample for the special project. Tofu place it is. The place is packed. They wait outside about 5 minutes and are ushered in.

After eating delicious tofu, they hit the road and head over the Heyri, an art village in Paju. Feeling that Heyri is a nice place to hang out, Oh also thinks that Cathy would love this place. He also thinks that he should have taken her here in lieu of Insadong the other day. While his mentor gives Oh a short tour around the place, they end up in a book store looking like a gigantic shed. Oh walks inside and finds that the place is actually really nicely decorated, artistic and architecturally strcutured. He starts to parse a book about Van Gough.
Oh seldom understands art, well, certain types of art, such as drawing, patinting, sculpturing. Surely, they look nice, but never actually deliver life-changing experience to Oh's personal life. However, when Oh continues to read Van Gough's book and runs into some of the most famous portraits, it sorta strikes him. This gets Oh thinking "What am I doing here? Where am I in my life?..." Alas, the place is too swamped to take time and meditate on such philosophical questions. Bummed out a bit, Oh and the mentor walks out of the building and walks more around Heyri.
Getting back on the car, the mentor re-sets the designation to Suwon on his GPS navigation system. Hitting the road again. Living up the little title that his mentee gave him, the mentor, while driving, bombards Oh with a number of advice as to how to live a life, how to excel in his work and whatnot. Most of times, Oh does not like to take advice from people because he is an egoist. But the mentor's advice is different. It is genuine, helpful, detailed, not condescending, but realistic. So Oh just tries to regurgitate every single word coming out of the mentor's mouth.

On his way back to Suwon, Oh notices his cell phone starting to buzz. A text message "Hey, I am throwing a wine party at a Frazer Suite pent house near Insadong, Do you wanna come?" has arrived. It is from Alex one of the mentors in Oh's life. There are three mentors. And this mentor Oh met in the military. He currently works for the VP of SC Banks in Korea as a personal translator. It has been awhile since Oh saw him, so regardless of the possible characteristics of party, Oh wants to go all the way up to Seoul as soon as he arrives Suwon.

But Oh is not sure if he would fit in "Wine Party" and upscale "Penthouse" He is a pretty down to earth guy. At first, Oh thinks that Wine Party is like a private one where these snobbish people gather, sip glasses of wine, exchange businesse cards and look for eligible bachelor(ettes) to sleep with or to get hitched to. But, knowing that Alex is a snob nor a son of a rich family, Oh finds himself lean toward the idea. So Oh calls up Alex and bombards him with questions as to "Who is going to be there? Is there anyone that I know of? What is the dress code? Is there an entrance fee?"

Then Oh arrives Suwon and still is not sure whether to go to Seoul or not. Oh thinks that getting prepped and going all the way up to Seoul is just pain in the ass. But it will even out the fact that he will get to see a good ole friend! Still undecided, Oh leaves the office, saying good bye to and thanking his mentor at work, and heads directly to the gym.

The trainer was not there. So Oh stretches out and starts to work on his quads. Oh asks the front desk clerk about whereabouts of the trainer to which the clerk says that he is one his way back to the gym right now.

The trainer shows up. The gym is empty. Oh thinks that this is a perfect timing to get a free one-on-one lesson. The majority of the gym members just comes to the gym, works out and leaves. Oh, having been taken work-out more seriously, thinks that it would be stupid not to take advantage of the trainer while he can. Oh has been cozying up the trainer and the kid is quite nice and hospitable. Anyways, today Oh needs to work on his shoulders.

The trainer teaches Oh some routines and corrects his postures. Oh, while feeling utmost pain on his shoulders, actually relishes every single moment in that workout makes him feel alive and helps him relieve stress to the great extent. After a 50 min long private lesson, Oh calls it a day, takes a shower, winks at himself in the mirror, jumps out, puts back on the clothes, and comes back home. Then he starts to doll up to go to Seoul.

On the bus to Seoul, Oh is in disbelief, thinking that he rarely goes up to Seoul unless it is very necessary. But now he is. It is not a time-sensitive matter or urgent, either. He just wants to see his good ole friend. Although Alex enticed Oh to come to the party, telling him that they are a lot of eligible, good looking, successful singles at the party Oh just does not really care about them much.

Oh, however, wonders if he by chance could run into her in the middle of Seoul, knowing that she could be in Seoul now. He has lots of things to say to her. Bitterness again.
Upon arrival Seoul, he spots the penthouse right away. He is actually surprised to see that luxurious building standing next to Insadong. He has never noticed the building before. According to Alex, monthly rent is 7,000,000 won. Oh flabbergasts.

He calls Alex who then comes down to the lobby and lets him in by swiping the card. They exchange firm man-hugs. It is always sooo good to see friends.

Reaching the 15th floor, they enter the room. All eyes upon Oh. Oh is obviously nervous. 3 guys and 7 girls. Oh thinks that it is going to be a very interesting night. The night is young and they drink (Oh does not), eat, chit-chat. The first impression that Oh gets is that the party members are snobs. But it turns out to be wrong later. Well, some of them are snobbish.
As times goes by some leave the place. Oh needs to decide whether to go back down to Suwon or just stay up all night with total strangers that he gets on the wrong foot with. Oh is still on the fence. In order to catch the last bus Oh needs to leave right now. But Alex talks him into staying and he falls for it solely because he could talk the night away with Alex.
Around midnight, there are only 4 people left. Two girls and two boys (Oh included). They talk, eat, and drink (Oh still does not). Oh feels left out because except for Oh, they all know each other. They are all co-workers. Actually, the party members are some of the close co-workers of Alex or at least previous ones. So probably 75 percent of time, they talk about their work, other colleagues and trash talk them. Oh starts to pitify them because he thinks it is a bit stupid to talk about your work outside the work. Also, Oh thinks that it is insensitive of them to talk about their work while they are fully aware that Oh has no idea what they are talking about. Office cliques..

It is around 3:20 am and everyone feels tired.

There are four people and only two beds in the place.

Next morning, only in his boxers, Oh gets up and takes a shower. With Alex, Oh leaves the place. The girls are still sleeping in. Alex needs to participate in choir practice at this church near Oh's parents' house. Oh shortly contemplates whether he will head parents' home with Alex. But Oh needs to work out later and above all feels tired. So, after exchanging firm handshakes, Oh and Alex go separate ways and promise to see each other later.

"What a day" Oh thinks.

Things that I have done today before I punch out



(In a time sequence)

1. Felt bitter, got up, took a shower, ate, came to work.

2. Still felt bitter and went about a day by taking care of one of myriads of paper work.

3. Could not simply shake off the bitterness and dug myself in a pile of paper work.

4. Went out to lunch at a local chicken place and ate for free. Started to feel better and relished
sunshine a lot.

5. Swamped with more paperwork.

6. A bit shocked to know that I might take a business trip to Shanghai.

7. Made doznes phone calls to Germany and realized that German ladies voice is super sexy.

8. Began to feel bitter again, looking at my computer monitor.

9. Contemplated when I am going to get my dad's car.

10. Sucking on a rolliepop and a bit hyped up probably because of sugar.

11. Excited about the idea that I am going to the gym later. Will ask the trainer to train me real
hard. He is a good kid. My grand project has just begun.

12. Made another phone call to Germany. A guy picked up the phone. Felt bitter.

13. Tried to count how many girl friends I have had and how the relationships were. Thought
this is just useless and unproductive.

14. Contemplated whether I should take a friend of mine's suggestion that he set me up on a
blind date with this 5'7 inch tall graduate school student who, according to my friend, is super rich. He's been urging me to take him upon the offer. Need to think about it.

15. Thought I need to read the Bilble more.

16. Contemplated whether I should take part in a friend of mine's wedding tomorrow. She is the best friend of one of my ex's, who at age 24, got hitched to this super rich guy and ended up getting divorced. Afterwards, she, through the mutual friend, conveyed the message that she would liek to meet me in person, which I thought was pretty interesting. Her nickname back in college was "1 out of 100", which means only 1 out of 100 guys could be her boyfriend

17. Wondering when this bitterness will go away.

18. Thanked Amy Xiong for all the advice that she gave me today and wish her new hairdo would turn out fantastic.
19. Feeling bitter while writing this. Thinking of her.

20. Curious if I could turn the clock back and be 20 years old again.

21. Excited about the idea to meet up Ria if I went on a trip to Shanghi this month.

22. Contemplated how to say "Your workload will snowball as of today and you've only got
a month here. It is not personal nor my decision" to the temp at the office when she comes back on Monday.
23. Still feeling bitter and thinking about her.

Coworkers

As much important as it is where you work, whom you work with is also crucial. In this regard, I am very fortunate to have very professional colleagues. My team, overseas marketing team consists of 5 (me inclusive) members.

The team captain; he used to work at KNTO (Korean National Tourism Organization) for years, later moved to Hyundai Asan that has paved the way to nurture Korean's tourism in North Korea, in particular Geumgang Mountain and Kaesung. He basically started the whole thing from scracth and set up the things now known as Hyundai Geumgang Mountain Tour. From time to time he talks about entertainment industry and behind stories that he knows of. According to him, he knows people in the industry and thus gets updated on juicy stories of Korean entertainment field. He seems to be callous from time to time, but that is his style. Seemingly, he talks insensitively, but deep down, we all know that he is a good person. He lost his father in-law few weeks ago. He's been suspicious as to whom I live with..hehe. The area that I live is pretty flamboyant and full of bars and whatnot. So he thinks that I live with one of juicy girls or young college girl. Well, no one except for my folks has been my home..so who knows?

And the ranking number two, she is in Europe now, on 3 week long trip, which she got lots of denouncement from outside the department. She is in charge of Chinese tourism and has been associated with the government office and so forth. Fully capable of speaking both Mandarin and Cantonese, she is very professional and that's why she has not been married, yet. Workaholic she seems to be sometimes. One day, I needed to pick up something that I forgot at work and thus came back to work around 11pm. And she was still there staring her computer monitor and constantly typing up something. I was very impressed with her dedication and devotion to her work. And I believe that she deserves her trip to Europe, (well it is not a trip actually, the company endorses her trip to Europe in order to ameliorate the employee's sense of tourism). She earned it herself. And she said that this is her first time to go on a long trip since she started to get invovled in tourism about 20 years ago. She was very ecstatic about it, but those who have no idea why her trip to Europe is so meaningful to her say "She just kicking it off in Europe. It is very irresponsible for her to take a trip at this very busy time of the year." Well, I don't think so. She won the very competitive competition and thus has all the right to relish what she's obtained.

And my mentor. He is smart. Probably one of the smartest persons I have ever seen. Both book smart and street smart. Ambitious, funny and sensible. From the very day I started to work, he has been giving me a lot of advice as to how to live a life, to excel at work and to further my career. The pieces of advice were not just superficial, but very realistic and helpful. Of course, I have not done any of them, but once I stay on track, I will. He is like my brother that I don't have. I am an only child as you know. He sits right next to me and always welcomes my inquiries and make fun of me as to, again, whom I live with. And he's got a one year old son, so always shoves the baby's pictures taken on cell phone in my face. Oh..and he eats constantly. But he ain't a pig.

The last one, the japanese master. Whenever she is on a business call with some Japanese person, I feel like some kind of channeling happens to her. The voice tonality completely switches to that of Japanese women, which is quite ticlkish. Sometimes she is moody and thus throws tantrum at me, but other times she is very helpful and nice. She always talks about her 2 year old son that is living with his grandmother. Somtimes she is harsh, but most of time, just like my mentor, she is very helpful and I consider her from time to tim my older sister, which also I do not have.

Taken all together, my coworkers are very professional and caring. But work is work. I need to be professional as much as they are. And I don't need to cozy up to them. But sometimes, like today, I would like to depend upon them and listen to their good ole stories or advice. After all, we all should live in harmony.